I recently reconnected with a college friend at a party. We haven't been in touch for a few years but have mutual friends.

I hear details about her life, and I'm sure she hears about mine. We are both working and in serious relationships, like most people our age. I bet she even has a 401(k) plan, too.

But she feels the need to remind me that we've matured.

When I kidded her about not wasting beer as she poured hers out, she replied, "We're not in college anymore. I think we've grown up by now."

Yes, we have. At least I have. But that doesn't mean giving up on jokes, even lame ones.

I hate to keep beating my upcoming 30th birthday to death, but it really is a good time to take stock of what I'm doing and what I've done. I've already figured out that I don't have to look a certain way. Should I act a certain way?

Is it time to be more serious about life? Should I save the sarcasm for the old-age home, when no one will care what I say or how I wear my blue hair? Should I be even more mindful of my grammar?

Perhaps the perfect time to practice my new mature self will be when I actually have my birthday party -- if I have one.

I'm torn. I love throwing parties, but there is something anticlimactic about a 30th birthday. I'm not at the point where I will have to worry about over-the-hill references or R.I.P. cards, but am I getting a little old for all the brouhaha?

Many people choose to go all out on this big occasion. Others prefer to pass the day silently, rather than draw attention to the milestone. I'm somewhere between 30 shots and 30 reasons to go to bed early.

Should I act like a big girl and skip the cake and candles? Parties are for kids, after all.

Birthdays, however, are not. They are a time to gather people together and selfishly celebrate the one day that I can claim as my own. If that's childish, so be it.

The big three-oh is not an end, but the beginning of a new phase, one in which I can be as mature or immature -- that is, fun -- as I want to be.

I feel no need to demonstrate my maturity. A few years ago, I would have been worried about what my college friends would think of my job and other accomplishments -- or the lack of them.

I think I've finally gotten a little perspective on what matters -- my happiness, health and relationships with family and friends, especially the fun ones. If that old campus pal doesn't get the joke, it's her loss.

I have nothing to prove. But I do have a party to plan.

Laura Lewis Brown is an adventurous newlywed who has loved, lost and doesn't mind sharing.